Writing to Transplant Recipients and Donor Families
LifeShare Transplant Donor Services of Oklahoma supports written correspondence between transplant recipients and donor families. Initially, all correspondence is completely anonymous and identities are kept confidential.
The decision to write to the transplant recipients or donor family is a very personal one,and may not be right for everyone. Sometimes, donor families and transplant recipients choose to correspond to share information about themselves and their loved one. For some families, this sharing helps with the grieving process and also allows transplant recipients the opportunity to express their gratitude for the gift of life.
If you would like to write to your donor family or transplant recipients, here are some general guidelines to help you.
Provide General Information:
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Keep identities anonymous and confidential...avoid including any last names, street addresses, city names or phone numbers.
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You may want to include your name or your loved one's name (first name only) as well as information about your/their job, family and friends, hobbies and interests.
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If you are including religious comments, please consider that the religious beliefs of the transplant recipients or donor families are unknown.
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Closing Your Letter:
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Identify your relationship to the donor or recipient; for example, donor mom, donor wife, transplant recipient, recipient's mom, etc...
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Sign your first name only.
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Mailing Your Card Or Letter:
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Place your card or letter in an unsealed envelope.
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Include a separate piece of paper with the donor or recipient's full name, date of donation or transplant, the hospital where the donation or transplant occurred and your full name and relationship to the donor or recipient. Also include your contact information to be used by LifeShare only.
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Place these items in another envelope and mail them to:
LifeShare Transplant Donor Services of Oklahoma
Donor Family Services Coordinator
4705 NW. Expressway
Oklahoma City, OK 73132
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Allow Extra Mailing Time:
It may take a few weeks after you’ve mailed your card or letter for the transplant recipient or donor family to receive it. Letters will be reviewed to ensure confidentiality. Letters to recipients are sent to the transplant facility where they received their transplant. The transplant coordinator at that facility will forward it to the recipient. Letters to donor families will be sent to the donor family directly from LifeShare.
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If you need further information about writing to transplant recipients or donor families, please call:
LifeShare Transplant Donor Services of Oklahoma at (405) 840-5551, ext. 115 or 145; or toll free at 1-888-580-5680, ext. 115 or 145; or email at bereavement@lifeshareok.org.
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Will I hear from the donor family or transplant recipient?
There is always the chance that you will not get a response. Many transplant recipients are overwhelmed with emotion and have difficulty putting their feelings into words. Others may take several months or even years before they feel comfortable contacting the donor family.
For donor families, if no response from the transplant recipient is received, this does not make your decision or your loved ones' donation any less important. Without it, these recipients may not have had a second chance at life. The families of these recipients will always be deeply grateful.
Many transplant recipients and donor families ask if they will ever be able to have personal contact. We have found that after a period of anonymous correspondence, the desire to meet is often expressed by one or both parties. If there are no extenuating circumstances and both sides express a desire to meet, LifeShare Transplant Donor Services of Oklahoma will, with the permission of both parties, facilitate the exchange of personal information.
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